Letter from my Terrace in Palma 'Hiding behind words'

                                                                       Tutshill,

Chepstow

12 May, 2020

Hiding behind words

Once more this letter is not from my terrace in Palma. But one sunny day I will be back. But ‘I don’t know when’, as Vera Lynn sang to the troops far away and to their families at home during the darkest days of WW2. Those were uncertain times and, in a different way, so are these.

Many of us are now confined to our homes and have time to listen to interviews on the radio and TV.   Have you noticed how people often use a readymade word or phrase and thus avoid the effort of saying what they really mean.  So instead of saying ‘I had to learn a lot very quickly’, they say ‘It was a steep learning curve’. This phrase is the quick fix. When used, it suggests that the point is made there is nothing more to discuss. It suggests a certain authority. If the listener says, ‘What do you mean by ‘a sharp learning curve’?’ the speaker is often at a loss for a clear paraphrase.  But no listener dares do that. Above all, expressions like this save the speaker the effort of having to express clearly what they mean.  It is like having a takeaway meal rather than cooking one yourself.

Another example is the expression ‘in denial’. Instead of saying ‘Mary just won’t accept was has happened, they say, ‘Mary is in denial’ and then there is no more to be said. The listener does not like to inquire further. You can make your own list of words to hide behind as you hear them on the radio. Instead of collecting beer mats or toy cars, collect the readymade phrase! They are in good supply at the moment!

I once saw an Oprah Winfrey programme. Her guests were discussing the obsession of getting things absolutely right such as having the toilet roll always facing the correct way in the bathroom. One said, ‘My husband is a perfectionist’. Then she corrected herself. ‘Sorry, I forgot we’re not allowed to say the key word.’ The participants had been instructed not to use the word ‘perfectionist’. How sensible! Each person had to make the effort to describe clearly what they were talking about. They couldn’t hide behind a word. 

‘I am a bit of a Luddite at heart.’  This is used to show reluctance to use the latest technology. But the speaker rarely knows who the Luddites were, or what they really campaigned for. They are simply repeating a set phrase. The listener does not like to question it for fear of showing ignorance but, in fact, the speaker knows little more.

Someone says to you, ‘My marriage is breaking up’. Here the marriage is given an identity and life of its own. It becomes a third party in addition to the husband and wife. They, it seems, have little to do with it. The marriage is now something apart like their fridge or washing machine that no longer works.  Using this phrase avoids any clear thought about what is really happening. If you use second hand words, your thoughts will be second hand too.

One of the most abused phrases today is ‘Research says’. This has many variants such as ‘Research indicates’ and ‘According to recent research’. This phrase sets a seal of respectability on the view of the speaker. If the user is a university professor who has the research at their fingertips, then fine. However, most speakers rarely stop to explain what research it is, over how long or how many people took part. Unless the research can be specified, the two words ‘Research says’ are meaningless.

Finally consider the phrase ‘out there’. You will hear this twenty times a day if you listen to the radio. A typical example is ‘There are a lot of people out there who agree’. Take the phrase out of the sentence and you have ‘There are a lot of people who agree.’  What is lost?  Nothing at all. Of course the people are out there. Where else are they going to be? Even the weather forecast is not immune. ‘Today it’s going to be cold out there.’ Where else can it be cold?  Don’t follow the tramlines that these expressions restrict you to. Use your own words.

These expressions are simply a crutch to help a lame speaker through their conversation.

Please say what you mean. Make the effort to think for yourself.  Be clear and creative. Do not hide behind words. It really doesn’t help.