The Tall Girl from Somerset 6 Harvey A walk, a short year and a parting.
Harvey A walk, a short year and a parting.
Saturday
came at last though it had only been hours away.
Time is never constant. It runs during an exam but dawdles and
almost stops before that first date finally comes. Harvey's car, of
course, would not start!
Such is the cussedness of machines! He cycled to Anne’s college,
apologized about the car, and they walked from there, through the Parks, slowly
by the river, down to the centre of the city, had a coffee and then walked back
again. They could have carried on walking together for hours. They talked and talked and when they had nothing to say, they were also happy. And then on Sunday they met again. Oxford had suddenly changed for both of them. The morning mists and the dark evenings did not matter.
The days passed, the weeks passed and then the months. The year went by too fast, too fast for both of them because they both knew it was Harvey’s last at Oxford. For Anne, her first year there was the realization of all that she felt that university would be when she had thought about it at school. At school the sixteen year-old looks forward to “university”. It is the Promised Land, where anything can happen. It fulfills the hopes of some. For others, it can be a terrible disappointment. For Harvey it was the very happy culmination of four happy years. He had gone through university easily, one of the lucky few to ride carefree over the mountains of youth. He hadn’t wanted to change the world, he hadn’t wanted to feed the hungry masses of Africa at a stroke or to bring down the government in one massive demonstration in Trafalgar Square. Managing a reasonable pass in his exams and making it into his college rugby team, playing cricket in the summer and then some acting and a lot of parties: this had been enough for him. The world was OK as it was. If he could enjoy it and help one or two people around him to do the same, then that was as much as he wanted.
The days passed, the weeks passed and then the months. The year went by too fast, too fast for both of them because they both knew it was Harvey’s last at Oxford. For Anne, her first year there was the realization of all that she felt that university would be when she had thought about it at school. At school the sixteen year-old looks forward to “university”. It is the Promised Land, where anything can happen. It fulfills the hopes of some. For others, it can be a terrible disappointment. For Harvey it was the very happy culmination of four happy years. He had gone through university easily, one of the lucky few to ride carefree over the mountains of youth. He hadn’t wanted to change the world, he hadn’t wanted to feed the hungry masses of Africa at a stroke or to bring down the government in one massive demonstration in Trafalgar Square. Managing a reasonable pass in his exams and making it into his college rugby team, playing cricket in the summer and then some acting and a lot of parties: this had been enough for him. The world was OK as it was. If he could enjoy it and help one or two people around him to do the same, then that was as much as he wanted.
The
university year is short anyway, but for Anne and Harvey it seemed a matter of
weeks.
They
met in November. Autumn fell into
winter, and it rained and it was muddy.
The frosts came and went through the rugby season. Spring grew into summer, the hedges turned
green and when summer came, so did the exams.
And that is the university year at Oxford. Like youth, it is very short. And like all wishes, you only have three. Three short
years.
There
had been many happy drinks and walks.
There had been hours spent together in the consuming business of the day-to-day:
shopping and eating, going to the cinema and mending punctures on Anne’s
bike. ‘Why do his tyres never puncture
while mine always do?’ Writing essays,
looking for books in libraries and talking late into the night. ‘He took me to films and I took him to
concerts.’
But then in September when the year becomes serious again, they parted.
Yes, they parted. “Lord, what fools
these mortals be!” He wanted to be a
teacher and went to Manchester for his year of teacher training. Why Manchester for heaven's sake? Why
didn’t he do this year in Oxford? He
told Anne that he just needed a change and that, he told himself, was the truth.
What
could Anne do except look forward bleakly to her second year, a year on her own?
A
secondary school in the early sixties did not equip its sixth formers for a
love life. Double maths, double French.
No double tactics of love. And Greek and Latin? What had Anne learned from that? Dido deserted by Aeneas? Ariadne dumped on Naxos? Not much encouragement there! She had no resources to fall back on, no way
of making him stay, and so Harvey went to Manchester.
‘I’ll
never forget the day he left though I hate remembering it. It was a Tuesday, and it was a wet and misty
Tuesday. Tuesday, of all the days of the week, is the day I hate the most. When has anything good happened on a
Tuesday? I was OK while I helped him
pack. I could find things, sort out
things and then pack them up. If you’re
doing something, you’re OK. It’s doing nothing that’s terrible. That’s when the mind opens and the worries
rush in, when you’re doing nothing.
There were even one or two bright moments, I remember. One was when I counted 23 single socks. I made a pile and counted them. Yes, he had 23 odd socks. But then it was
all finished, the bags were done, and the last tea was drunk, and the mugs were
washed and that was it and he left. The
Mini went up the road and round the corner and that was it. Don’t watch him out of sight! That’s bad luck! Who said that? It was Grandma. I remember she used to say that.’
And
she watched the smoke of the exhaust as the overloaded Mini struggled up the
road, and she felt sick. Her head was
heavy, her stomach was weak, and life stretched ahead. She tried to keep busy. Going through all the steps of making a meal
was a help, but then the meal was made and it was eaten, alone, and the plate was washed up and life had to
be faced again. “Parting is such sweet
sorrow.”
So where’s
the sweetness? Only when there is a tomorrow. The line needs the rhyme and people need
something to look forward to. You must
have something on the horizon.
A
night’s rest helped, and so did the things that had to be done next day. But love is never fair. It lifts you up for
a time, and then drops you down again, and then you are worse off than you were
before.
Two more years to
go. Two more years to do for her degree.
So during those sad days
in late September, when the mornings and evenings are damp with autumn, and you
think you can cross the lawn without getting your shoes wet, and so you wear your shoes, and
you come back to the kitchen with them soaked, in late September then, Anne
slowly packed her suitcases for the new university year.
‘Why shouldn’t I meet
someone else. I don’t want to meet
anyone else. Work, work work. That’s always the solution, isn’t it? How do retired people manage? Or have they learned to face life by
then? Yes, that’s the way forward. Work.’
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